Respect
by Tsuki no Lomelinde
Summary: Peter and Carter try to reconcile their differences, but is it too great to fix? WARNING! this may become slash in the future, i'm still deciding
1. Fears and Realities

"Respect"  
  
By: Tsuki no Lomelinde  
  
Summary: A young doctor is involved in a serious accident, will it ruin his career? Or will he persevere, and not let anything, not even what some people consider a handicap stand in his way.  
Characters: JC, PB, Cast  
  
This is my second ER story, set back right after the episode "Post Mortem"- where Carter confronts Benton about his lack of emotion to the death of Dennis Gant.  
  
Blah, blah, blah, I don't own any of these characters. You know the drill And now I say 'On with the story!!!!!'  
  
Carter stood by his jeep, digging through his pockets, then his brief case in search of the keys to his jeep, he'd just gotten off a 12 hour shift; he'd been covering the ER. Dennis's shift, and the memorial service; now he had to go back to the apartment, alone, Abby was gone, Dennis was gone, and Benton pretended like nothing had ever happened. So where did that leave him?  
Carter's search for his keys paused for a moment as he remembered his teacher's attitude, that day. Cold and uncaring.  
Just as his fingers grasped the keys, he heard a click, and a voice whisper, "Don't move or I'll shoot ya."  
Carter froze, his breath catching in his throat.  
"Go over to the other side of the car, and get in, and don't say a word, or your life won't be worth anything."  
Carter nodded shakily, and with the gun still aimed at his head, he moved around to the other side of the car, and got in, his attacker got in the driver's side, and started the car. Carter studied his assailant, trying to get as many details as possible, the man had deep green eyes, dark brown hair and he was a good three inches taller then the young doctor.  
"We're gonna go for a little ride, Dr. Carter." The man said.  
Carter's eyes widened, how did this man know his name? He couldn't remember seeing him anywhere?  
The man smirked, and they pulled out of County's parking garage, and drove off into the night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The officer trudged into the hospital, dreading her task, even though it was part of her job, her partner gave her a reassuring pat on the back  
  
"You can do it Johansson." He said confidently.  
  
She nodded slightly. "I hope so."  
  
The ER was crowded, and the two officers had trouble making their way to the Admit desk.  
The desk clerk looked up, he was a tall burly looking man; the officer's partner nudged her.  
  
"I'm Officer Johansson, and this is my partner."  
"Officer Garson." He interrupted.  
"Yes, we're looking for Dr. Benton, one of the resident surgeons here."  
"Uhhh, sure, he's in with a trauma, he'll be with you in a few minutes."  
"Thank You."  
  
At just that moment, a dark burly man approached them.  
  
"Dr. Benton." The clerk called, and Dr. Benton looked up.  
"These two officers were looking for you."  
"Thanks Jerry." Dr. Benton said.  
"What can I do for you?" The surgeon asked.  
"We need to speak to you in private, Dr. Benton." Johansson said.  
"Alright, we can go to the lounge." Peter said.  
  
Dr. Weaver chose that moment to walk over.  
"Is there a problem officer's?" she asked.  
"Who are you?" Garson questioned.  
"I'm Dr. Kerry Weaver, Chief of the ER."  
Johansson, stole a glance at her partner, he nodded subtlety.  
"Then I believe that we will need to tell you also Dr. Weaver."  
The petite doctor nodded.  
  
As soon as the door was closed Officer Johansson, began to speak,  
  
"We need to speak to you concerning one of your students."  
  
Dr. Benton nodded, not liking the nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach "Alright."  
  
"A few hours ago, we got a call about a car that had been found over an embankment, we arrived on the scene; there was one person at the scene ." She paused.  
"He had with him a hospital lab jacket, that I.D.'s him as Jonathan T. Carter; he was dead on arrival to the scene. We tried to get into contact with his family, but there was no answer, so we found his file and we figured that someone here could come down to Mercy and identify the body."  
  
"Oh my God." Kerry gasped.  
  
"I'm sorry." Officer Johansson whispered.  
  
Kerry sat heavily in a chair, and Peter gripped the back of it, hard, his eyes suspiciously bright.  
  
He took a deep breath, "Alright, I'll go and... identify, the. the body."  
"Thank you." Officer Johansson said gently.  
  
Kerry stood up, "I'll go and tell everyone the news." She whispered tearfully.  
  
They left the lounge; Peter followed the officers to the door, and paused as Kerry tried to get everyone's attention.  
  
"Could everyone listen for a moment?" She said barely keeping a sob out of her voice. Everyone looked at her, confused as to why she was so upset.  
  
"I have just been told by these two officers that, Dr. John Carter has been killed in a car accident. He was dead on arrival to the scene."  
  
There were a few startled gasps from the gathered staff.  
  
"Dr. Benton has been asked to go down and identify the. the body." Kerry continued.  
  
"Let's go Dr. Benton." Officer Johansson said, and they walked out the door.  
  
On the ride there, Officer Garson explained to the surgeon how it would be.  
  
"He was thrown through the windshield, we found him about ten feet away from the car. It. it might seem a little.scary, but we need you to do this."  
  
Peter only nodded.  
  
They stood in the morgue at Southside Hospital, and Peter stood in front of the table where the Medical Examiner waited to pull the sheet down away from Carter's face.  
Peter held his breath, trying to keep his emotions under control. The M.E. pulled down the sheet, and Peter stared, his eyes wide in shock, he turned to the two officers that stood next to him, and let out a breath.  
  
"It isn't him."  
  
"What?" Officer Garson said and looked down at the body as if expecting it to say something.  
  
"That isn't John Carter." Peter said.  
  
"This is the body we found." Officer Johansson said and looked at her partner for confirmation.  
  
"I'm telling you that it's not him, Carter's eyes are brown, not green, and he's shorter then this guy." Peter stated.  
  
"Hmmm. then who is he?" Officer Garson asked to no one in particular.  
  
They all stared at the body lying on the table in front of them.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Brown eyes opened, and a young man squinted, trying to get his vision to focus, he gazed around the room, taking in its familiar white walls; a hospital room, he hated the color white, it always seemed so impersonal. He knew he wasn't at County, how he knew, he couldn't say, he supposed it was from working there so long.  
  
No, he had to focus. What had happened how had he come to be in this place? He reached up to scratch his head, as he felt an itch, but then he realized that he couldn't there was a bandage in his way, his slender hand fell back to the bed as he gazed at the heart monitor, he could see the thin lines that moved in rhythm to his heart beat, but something felt wrong, then it hit him, he couldn't hear the steady beeping of the machine. And he began to feel the panic building with in him.  
He froze as he felt hands grab at him, and memories of what had happened came back to him in a rush.  
Getting cornered by his jeep by the gunman.the terrifying drive.the crash. But what happened after that? How had he come to be in this place? He had a good reason for why he couldn't hear he probably had received head trauma. But was it permanent?  
He forced his focus back to what was going on around him.  
He looked around the room, seeing that he was calm, the doctor and nurses, cautiously let go of him. The young woman, John assumed that she was a doctor by her white coat, gave him a gentle smile.  
She said something to him, but as he was never good at lip reading he wasn't exactly sure of what she had said. She looked at him perplexed, then at his chart, then back at him.  
"Can you understand me?" She said, at least that's what John thought she said, he nodded, then put his hand to his ear, and shook his head.  
She turned to the nurses, and a few moments later they were wheeling him out of the room.  
The doctor handed him a pad of paper, with something written on it.  
I'm Dr. Ellis. You were in an accident. Can you tell me your name?  
John read it, and when she handed him a pen he wrote,  
I'm Dr. John Carter, what hospital am I at?  
She read the note then looked at him surprised.  
You're at St. Agnes Mercy Hospital; we're taking you down for a head C.T. Is there anyone you want me to call? She wrote.  
John thought for a moment, his parents were in Italy, and Gamma and his Grandfather were in Germany. That ruled out any family. He thought harshly.  
He finally thought of someone to call, and wrote down the names and number.  
Her eyes scanned the paper, she nodded, and handed it to one of the nurses with instructions, the nurse quickly left. She made her way to the admit desk and picked up the phone, quickly dialing the number, a voice on the other end answered saying "This is County Hospital..."  
  
Is it any good? Send me reviews!! Please? I'll keep up the story if anybody wants me to.  
Oh, and one more not, the sequel to Intuition that I was planning to write? Sorry but it doesn't look like it's gonna happen, unless someone wants to co-write it with me, I just don't have enough idea's to write the story by myself.  
  
Well this is the first chapter, tell me what you think. Constructive criticism is accepted, but all flames will be thrown into a dark abyss, and never heard from again, ever. 


	2. Realization

"Respect"  
  
By: Tsuki no Lomelinde  
  
Chapter 2: Realization  
  
Disclaimer: You guys know the drill, I don't own the characters of ER, the only characters that are mine are the ones I made up, they are purely fictional, and any resemblance to actual people is merely coincidental.  
  
So don't even bother trying to sue me, 'cause all you'll get is.* checks pockets* 36 cents.  
  
Summary: A young doctor is involved in a serious accident, will it ruin his career? Or will he persevere, and not let anything, not even what some people consider a handicap stand in his way.  
  
Characters: JC, PB, MG, and Cast  
  
And now on with the story!!!  
  
Mark was only listening to his patient with half an ear, today had been a very long tiring and emotional day, he'd been shocked at hearing the news that Carter was dead, then when Peter had come back, all shaky, and had informed them that the body he had been sent to identify, wasn't Carter. That had sure thrown everyone for a loop, now they were doubly worried, not knowing what had happened to the young doctor.  
  
Dr. Mark Greene received the page to the admit desk, and after finishing with his patient, he made his way over there.  
  
"What's up Jerry?" He asked.  
  
The clerk looked up at him,  
  
"St. Agnes Mercy Hospital is on the phone, the nurse over there said she needed to speak with you." Jerry said with a shrug, Mercy was on the other side of town, they never got calls from the small hospital, usually it was County doing the calling, looking for patient records, and such.  
  
Mark took the phone, curious.  
  
"This is Dr. Mark Greene" he said into the phone.  
  
"Dr. Greene? This Nurse Amie Gray, over at St. Agnes, a patient came into our ER this evening, the victim of some sort of accident; he. says his name is Dr. John Carter.  
  
Mark swore that he stopped breathing for a moment.  
  
"Dr. Greene?" The voice on the other side of the phone line asked worriedly.  
  
Then Mark said, "Is he alright? What's his condition?" Mark was embarrassed to hear the trembling in his own voice.  
  
"They just took him up for a head CT, he suffered some head trauma, has multiple cuts and abrasions, and." she paused "the doctors would really prefer to speak with you personally Dr. Greene."  
  
"Alright, I'll be there in a half an hour." Mark noticed that people were watching him, curious as to why he was so upset.  
  
"Thank you Dr. Greene. Dr. Ellis is in charge of his care, and will speak with you when you arrive."  
  
"Thank you very much Ms. Gray."  
  
"No problem at all."  
  
And with that the conversation was over. Mark briefly wondered why Carter would have him called and not his family, but his wonderings were cut short as he noticed some of the staff watching him.  
  
"They found Carter, he's at St. Agnes; he's alive." There was a collective sigh of relief, followed by cheers.  
  
Mark turned to Kerry, "Carter asked them to call me, the doctors there want me to come down and they'll inform me of his condition."  
  
"Go." Was all Kerry said, so Mark ran to the lounge; grabbed his jacket and ran out the door.  
  
His heart pounding, as he maneuvered his car through traffic, his thoughts drifting back to wondering why Carter had called the hospital, and not his family. It was then that he realized that he never heard Carter even mention his family, he wondered about that. 'Now isn't the time to be pondering about Carter's family.' He said mentally, arguing with himself 'Carter is lying in the hospital, and he called you, so get a move on it!'  
  
He pulled into the parking lot of the small Catholic hospital, and ran into the building; it was shaped like any other hospital, so he didn't stop to ask about directions to the Medical Ward. He did pause at the desk to ask where Dr. Ellis was, and as soon as the clerk had pointed him in the right direction he was off, skidding to a halt outside of the room where Carter and Dr. Ellis were, he opened the door carefully, he took in Carter's slender form-- the pale face, and deep bruises in contrast to each other, bandages swathed his head, and his left leg was in a cast, almost up to his thigh. He also had a pad of paper; a pen in his lap, and a frown on his face, but he was alive, and that was all that mattered in Mark's mind.  
  
Dr. Ellis looked up as a tall man entered the room, he was balding, and wore glasses. Seeing Dr. Ellis look away from him, Carter turned towards the doorway, his eyes lit up at seeing Mark standing there.  
  
"Dr. Greene? I'm Dr. Ellis"  
  
Mark nodded at her distractedly  
  
"Carter?" Mark asked, for some reason unknown to him he was afraid. well not afraid, more like nervous, there had been something in the nurse's voice when they'd spoken on the phone, that made him, feel as if there was something seriously wrong with Carter.  
  
When Mark spoke to him, the young doctor just frowned, and turned to look at Dr. Ellis, she gave him a slight smile; then turned to Mark; "Can I speak with you out in the hall for a moment Dr. Greene?"  
  
With one last look at Carter, Mark followed Dr. Ellis out into the hall.  
  
"Dr. Greene, Dr. Carter was brought in by one of our paramedic units, while they were on a routine run, they found him by the side of the road, he suffered multiple laceration, bruising, his left leg is broken in two different places, he had severe internal bleeding, which we fixed in the OR. and.and he suffered some inner ear trauma, we did a few tests, and. his hearing is pretty much obsolete, there are some new surgery's out there that may be able to help, but that would only leave him with, at best, a 20% chance of getting all of his hearing back.  
  
It would be best if he looked into some other options too, there are wonderful schools for the deaf, he could learn to sign, and lead a perfectly normal life."  
  
Mark stared at her in shock.  
  
"Dr. Greene?" Dr. Ellis asked when she got no response from him.  
  
"He's a doctor." Mark whispered. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
I know that it's short, but my muse isn't working that great right now, if anyone has any idea's I'd be thrilled to hear them. ^_^ thanks!!!  
  
All reviews and constructive criticisms are appreciated, however all flames will be thrown into a deep dark abyss and never heard from ever again.  
  
I'll try and get the next chapter out as soon as I can, but with school starting, it might take me a while. Ja ne Tsuki no Lomelinde 


	3. A Brief Interlude

"Respect"  
  
Interlude  
  
By: Tsuki no Lomelinde  
  
Summary: Carter returns to work after his traumatizing incident, how will the staff react to working with a deaf doctor?  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own ER!!!!!! No profit is being made from this story, it was written for solely entertainment purposes. However there are some characters of my own creation, they are purely fictional, any resemblance to real people, is totally coincidental. So there. *sticks to tongue*  
  
Do not take this story and post it without my permission, I'd love to have it posted at other sites, just ask me first.  
  
And now, on with the story.  
  
A young man stood in front of the ambulance bay doors nervously fidgeting, before taking a deep breath and walking in, it was his first day back, not as a surgeon though, that occupation didn't seem to suit him, now he was an ER resident.  
  
"Hey Dr. Carter!" Jerry said and waved at him.  
  
"Hey." Carter called back, and wandered towards the Lounge, once in there he found his locker and began stowing his stuff, all the while thinking of the past 9 months.  
  
After the 'accident' as he called it in his mind, because they'd never found out the reason that he'd been carjacked, seeing as the hijacker was dead, and he himself couldn't provide any answers, so the case had been closed. Anyway, after he'd been released from the hospital, after having the operation to try and correct his hearing, which hadn't worked well, he'd gone to learn sign language, and along the way, acquired a newly designed hearing aid.  
  
Someone tapped him on the shoulder startling him from his musings, he turned around and smiled, Mark grinned back in return.  
  
"It's nice to have you back John." The lanky doctor said.  
  
The young doctor smiled slightly, before pulling on his white hospital jacket, and walking out of the lounge.  
  
Mark watched him leave and vowed to keep an eye on the young doctor, it wasn't that he didn't think John could handle himself; he just wanted to avoid any problems the staff, namely, Dr. Romano, or patients, had with a hearing impaired doctor.  
  
Mark sighed, and followed John out of the lounge; he had a feeling that I was going to be a very long day.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
One surgical consult later, John was sitting in the lounge; his head in his hands; Mark stuck his head in.  
  
"I heard Romano was here." He said to the young doctor.  
  
John looked up, "what?"  
  
"Dr. Romano, did he give you a heard time?"  
  
John shook his head, frowning.  
  
"What's the matter then? Is everything okay?"  
  
"Yeah." Carter whispered softly.  
  
"Come on talk to me." Mark pleaded gently.  
  
"Dr. Benton."  
  
'What did Peter have to do with any of this?' Mark wondered  
  
"He won't even look at me. Did I do something wrong?"  
  
"Oh," was all Mark could manage to say to the obviously distressed doctor.  
  
"Just give him some time." Mark murmured trying to soothe Carter.  
  
Sorry, I know that it's short, but I needed to write this, you'll see when I post the next chapter.  
  
Please review it!!! All constructive criticism, and praises are appreciated, however, all flames will be thrown into a deep dark abyss and never heard from ever again. 


	4. Adjustments and Repercussions

Respect  
  
By: Tsuki no Lomelinde  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of ER, however, Dr. Ellis, and any other characters that I happen to create are my own, if they bear any resemblance to real people; it is totally coincidental.  
  
Summary: Carter has survived a terrible event, and now three years later, he is thing to get on with his life, however, fate doesn't seem to want to give him a chance.  
  
Chapter three: Adjustments and Repercussions  
A few months later .  
  
A young man stood in the lounge of County General's ER, gazing out the window, the snow was falling gently, a half drunk cup of coffee sat on the table, next to a small device.  
  
The door flew open, and Chuni stuck her head in, "You still here Dr. Carter? We've got an MVA coming in. Dr. Carter?"  
  
But Dr. Carter didn't even acknowledge her presence; it was then that she spied his hearing aid sitting on the table. She walked over and tapped him on the shoulder, he whirled around startled.  
  
"Sorry." She said, and watched as he grabbed the hearing aid from its perch, and put it on.  
  
Then he smiled at her, blushing slightly at his unawareness. "What did you want Chuni?"  
  
"MVA's coming in; in about 10 minutes, Dr. Greene wanted to know if you wanted to take or if you wanted to head home and leave it to him."  
  
"I'll take it." Carter replied.  
  
Chuni left him, and he returned to his thoughts, it had been a year and a half since, the accident, it had been a struggle, he'd had to put his career on hold for a year, so that he could learn sign language, he'd gotten an operation to help try to correct his hearing, but it hadn't done very much, but with the help of a, then still in trial, hearing aid, he'd managed to get most of his hearing back but only with the small device.  
  
He'd also switched from surgery to the ER, it felt right to be there, where he could talk to the patients, and listen to what they had to say in return.  
  
He sighed, and left the room to prepare for the trauma.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Alright, what have we got?" Carter asked as they pushed the gurney into Trauma 1.  
  
The EMT looked at him before rattling off his report.  
  
"The patient is a 26 year old female, victim of an MVA; she's got, multiple abrasions, a possible concussion, and complains of stomach pain."  
  
"Thanks" Carter distractedly answered, and got to work.  
  
Orders were called for, and soon the patient was on her way to medicine, where she would get an abdominal CT, and if all was well only be held overnight for observation.  
  
Carter left the trauma room, and grabbed is coat from the lounge, hurrying to leave before another trauma came in. He walked into the ambulance bay, his footsteps echoed loudly on the concrete. He didn't see someone watching him, and follow in his wake.  
  
Carter stood by his jeep, fumbling for his keys when he felt someone tap him no his shoulder, he whirled around startled; and came face to face with Peter Benton.  
  
Both doctors stood in the parking garage for what seemed like an eternity, watching each other, both unsure of what to say.  
  
Peter offered an unsure smile, "Hey."  
  
"Hi Dr. Benton." Carter answered his voice unemotional. "Is something wrong?"  
  
Peter flinched at the younger doctor's tone of voice, but shook his head, "no nothing's wrong. I..." The normally sure of himself surgeon, shifted uneasily on his feet, "Listen, you wanna go and grab something to eat?"  
  
Carter blinked unsure if the hearing aid was working properly. Did Peter Benton, the most unemotional and distant person on the earth, just ask him to go get dinner, like friends? The man had barely even looked at him in months, and now.  
  
"It's okay if you don't want to." Peter stuttered out, and Carter's resolve crumbled.  
  
"Sure love to."  
  
It was Peter's turn to blink in surprise. "Okay, let's go. Is Doc Magoo's okay?"  
  
Carter nodded, and the two men made their way to the diner.  
  
They sat in the booth in an uneasy silence, having placed their orders.  
  
"So how have you been, I haven't seen you in a while." Peter started, breaking the tension.  
  
"Been busy, Weaver runs a tight ship. And it's.it's easier to keep busy."  
  
"Oh."  
  
They trailed off, the tension returning.  
  
"This is strange." Carter said shaking his head.  
  
"What?" Peter asked unsure of where this was coming from.  
  
"You." Peter winced at the harshness of the word. "When I came back from the school, you barely even looked at me for months, when you finally decide to talk to me; you acted like you couldn't get away fast enough. Does it bother you that I'm deaf.? Or is it because I quit surgery?"  
  
"Carter." Peter interrupted with a growl.  
  
His former student immediately stopped talking.  
  
"It's not any of that, when you were.gone, before we'd found you, the police came here and. and they told me you were dead, and they wanted me to.to go identify your body." Peter laughed harshly. "When we got to the morgue.it wasn't you, I didn't know whether to be thankful that it wasn't you lying on that slab, or worried sick about where you were. I'm sorry I was. scared to face you and I gave myself excuses. You were only my student anymore so why should I care about you outside of the hospital. But I did, you managed to worm your way past all of my defenses, and that scared me."  
  
Carter stared at his former mentor, that wasn't the answer he'd been expecting, uncomfortable with the scrutiny, Benton turned away.  
  
Carter sighed, this wasn't going as planned, an angry Benton he could handle, he'd been doing it long enough, but a Dr. Benton who wanted to talk and get all emotional just wasn't.normal, at least to him it wasn't.  
  
"And," Peter continued, staring at his hands. "I'm sorry, I know what I did, the way I treated you was wrong. I'd like it if you'd give me another chance."  
  
"I. I need to think for awhile." John said softly, "please? I just need awhile to think this through."  
  
Peter nodded, that was understandable and watched silently as the young doctor stood up.  
  
"I should get going." Carter whispered, so softly that Peter wasn't even sure if Carter had said anything at all, and with that the young doctor stood up, grabbed his coat and was gone.  
  
The surgeon just sat there, it wasn't supposed to be this hard.  
  
Carter was supposed to forgive him and life would go on as normal, unfortunately fate had other plans.  
  
I know it's taken me a looooong time to update, sorry about that but I've got a severe case of writers block no this one, I don't have a clue as to what will happen next, if anyone has any ideas I'd be more then willing to take a look at them.  
Until the next time,  
Tsuki no Lomelinde ^_^ 


End file.
